5 Marketing Ideas You Should Steal
Don't be bulldozed over by a sea of twats
Hi, it’s Ash—and welcome to Ashtronomical! Every Wednesday, you’re going to get 5 original marketing ideas your competitors will wish they'd thought of first. 💀 Maybe there’ll be one in here for you???
Steal this brand idea.
SPOILER. Experiential bookshop that only sells 5 books at a time. Each book has its own room. You show up and go through an interactive experience that mimics the setting of the book (time era, music, vibe), puts you in the shoes of the character, has food to nibble on that would have been served during that time period/place, shares a little bit of the backstory / theme / major conflict, asks you to make difficult choices that parallel those of the characters. Then, on your way out, you pay by buying a copy & having an (optional) drink at the Gatsby-themed cocktail library bar—where you could then read the book, if you so desired. (Imagine how many people would talk about this, and bring out-of-town visitors, just for the novelty factor. Would be even cool if you didn’t know what book it was until you’re through it. Sometimes, the best way to sell isn’t by adding more to your inventory: it’s by curating your inventory and turning it into an experience that none of your competitors can compete with.
Steal this sales idea.
Display how many slots are left on your calendar for the month. 🗓️ It’s weirdly effective. Notice how it focuses your mind and makes you pay attention. Wait, do I need this? Do I want this? I need to decide…now.
Which is brilliant, because usually when you see a sales page the first thing you think is: Oh, you’re selling something? Fuck you.
Bonus note: “Join waitlist” is an effective CTA for an agency, for the same reason: I want to be picked.
Steal this marketing idea.
Make *nothing* look like an ad. Make it look like a butthole.
I’m kidding. Do not make it look like a butthole. But, do make it look like a regular, everyday person posted it—because people do NOT want to look at ads. (But they might want to look at your butthole???)
Check this out, courtesy of Manny via Brad ⬇️
Before—EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW, GROSS AD, SKIPPING 🤮
After—OOOO, WHAT’S THIS SAY??? *READS…AND SUBSCRIBES*
This version doesn’t interrupt the user experience—it’s made for it.
Steal this copy idea.
Start with the second sentence. The first sentence is you clearing your throat. The second sentence is the point. The first almost always asks for permission to speak; the second one just busts down the door and says, “I’m here, motherfuckers.”
Before:
“When it comes to morning routines, everyone has their own way of starting the day. For me, it starts with yelling into the fridge like it owes me money.”
After:
“I start my mornings by yelling into the fridge like it owes me money.”
Before:
“As a business owner, I’ve learned a lot over the years. One of the hardest lessons? No one cares how hard you worked—only what you delivered.”
After:
“No one cares how hard you worked—only what you delivered.”
Before:
“Hey friends, hope your week is going great! I wanted to talk today about how we all secretly crave structure, even when we pretend we’re free spirits.”
After:
“We all secretly crave structure, even when we pretend we’re free spirits.”
Steal this business idea.
Go async. Apologize never.
New clients get a dedicated channel in Slack
They can drop ideas and materials into their channel
There are no meetings, no Zoom calls
Every Friday, you deliver a deliverable
YOU LIVE HAPPILY EVER AFTER
Most people fear that they’d lose business this way. But, do you know how many people would be thrilled to not have to have meetings and get on calls?????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
^Let’s pretend there are seven more lines of question marks, just for emphasis.
Seriously though: do YOU like meetings? Why not remove a pain point from your biz and just act “AS IF.” ← This is what I tell people who are scared of getting pushback on their business policies. You waltz in there and you act “as if” how you’re doing things were the most normal thing in the world. You teach people how to treat you, and you teach people how to do business with you. Because this is *your* business, and you get to decide how to run it. Do not be bulldozed over by a sea of twats.
P.S. It’s okay if some people don’t want to work with you. HOW YOU SHOW UP ATTRACTS WHO SHOWS UP.
The question is, are they people you like?
What happened to the year of living everywhere? Will there be upcoming articles on this too? (Just curious)